Been back from the celebrations for a while now, still don't feel much better than when I was there. I haven't drunk one drop of alcohol and I'm proud of that. It's just that... things happened that I wished didn't, or at least that I didn't have to see them happen. It was hurtful and I'm confused about what to do.
We started out with a champagne breakfast, where you drink champagne (or something else) and eat food/snacks etc. After four hours of just sitting we went to the biggest (I think) library we have in town to run down the hill like the little silly students we all are, no matter what age. Even though I didn't run, as I'm still recovering from an infection, it looked pretty funny with people trying to run when most others just didn't.
After this we ended up at one of the student nations (something all students of the university needs to be a part of) and pretty much everyone drank even more. They each got at least one bottle of champagne each and were spraying it, drinking it, spilling it, getting it up people's noses... you name it. It probably happened.
With all the people around drinking like mad, I kinda panicked and asked the head if I could use the piano, since playing calms me down. But unfortunately they had already rigged the room for the party later that night so I could get no where near the piano. If I had been able to play it would've been golden, as I not much later broke down and cried. This is why I really try to hold on to my friendships and keep them dear to me as one of my friends reminded me of how proud I should be of myself to have got this far. To have friends that can pick you up when you're feeling down, is amazing. I really treasure this friendship I have with this girl, she really is someone who is there for you when you really need it. Friendships like that are hard to find, and if you have one, make sure to keep it. It will make you go a long way.
"Angels, what are they? It could be a transparent figure with wings, or just someone transparent. Maybe there's an angel standing right in front of you, you just don't know it. Whatever they are I believe there is always someone watching over me. Werther it's an angel or just a human beeing, could be an animal too. Who knows? Maybe it's you."
That was an excerpt from a poem I wrote when I was fourteen/fifteen years old, spelling errors aside I think it has a point, even now, six years later.
I don't know where I'm going with this to be honest, just writing as I go along. As usual. No real structure, just a text. Actually, it's been a long time since I just wrote like this. Years. I guess the events of the day got the cup to overflow...
Well, I won't take up any more of your time. You take care and I hope to see you soon again.
"Sometimes it can seem so hard,
You fall down so many times,
Some days you don't want to get up,
You hurt inside and think that no one cares,
But friends are always there."
Friends Are Always There by Midnight Jazz at Fictionpress.com
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